The Apple

Year: 1980
Director: Menahem Golan
Writer: Menahem Golan
Genre: Musical: Romance

Usually I'm a fan of strange musicals and movies in general. Usually I will pop in movies with an aggregate 2 stars on IMDB and love them. Many times I have sat down to watch marathons of movies described as "so bad they're good". I chose to watch The Apple because it seemed to be perfectly golden and ridiculous for my tastes. I was completely wrong.

It is glamorous. In fact, it seems like the outfits for the Ballet 2000 team were touched up with more sparkles after filming. The movie attempts to be highly futuristic, at least in the outfits department. People are dressed up in gaudy, flamboyant fashion. The clothes aren't all together THAT outlandish though and mostly seem to rely on a future where everyone has really big shoulder pads.

The characters themselves aren't all that interesting. Even for a musical, things seem to happen much too quickly and the songs focus on mundane aspects of the story. All of this could be forgiven if at least the music was good. None of the songs really managed to catch my interest. It's really a shame because even in the worst musicals there's usually at least that one tune you'll be left humming later on. Some of the actors can't sing either, which doesn't help things.

Back to the story, it has the absolute worst ending anyone could ask for. It comes out of nowhere and is the funniest and most obvious example of deus ex machina I've ever seen on film. I'll admit the ending made me laugh but alongside the rest of the movie even it seemed out of place.

I was severely disappointed by The Apple. The best thing about it was that Catherine Mary Stewart had the lead female role (I loved her in Night of the Comet). Barring that though, there's really no reason to watch it. Go check out Showgirls instead for glitzy Hollywood film done so terribly it's a roller coaster of fun.