The Help

Year: 2011
Director: Tate Taylor
Writer: Tate Taylor, Kathryn Stockett
Genre: Drama

I liked The Help. As a mostly comedy with dramatic asides, it has some strong characters and a lovely narrative. There is also a lot wrong with this film, in my eyes. Despite that though it still manages to be a wholly enthralling narrative that kept my attention all the way through. Also, I loved the character of Celia. Yes, I loved her enough to state that in my first paragraph.

Basically in the film you've got a young woman who seems to rebel against every norm in her world. She's not really interested in getting a man - she's getting a job! She's also not taken aback by the idea of African Americans being equal to everyone else. Whatever she drank really should have gotten into the bodies of the other gals, but of course, if it did then we wouldn't have a movie.

Anyway, it's a film about this journalist who wants to get the true stories from "the help", or maids. So she goes for it and slowly gains the trust of the women she wants to interview. It's quite entertaining most of the time, so I'm not sure why exactly it's tagged as a "drama" on IMDB.

There's nothing wrong with a movie having fun, even for a semi-period piece. It just feels kind of bad to watch because of how it seems to push aside the harsh realities of the time. It might have been the 60s but damn if that wasn't practically a world away from where we are now. It was an extremely turbulent period for civil rights and nearly completely glossing over that was a huge failing, in my opinion. Yes, there's are a handful of moments in the film which attempt to bring this reality home. It never quite reaches though. There's a point where a young black woman is beaten by an officer, but then the fear of the moment is quickly dissipated by a new scene filled with patented sass.

The points the film seem to make are filled with good intentions, but that doesn't mean the film itself is pure. To me the things it teaches are that African American maids really were living a mostly fine life. Oh sure, they couldn't even use the same toilets but other than that they just had so much fun gabbing with their friends and making fun of white ladies behind their back. Oh sure, their friends were getting beaten by those who are supposed to protect the town, but what does it really matter when you can bake a pie with poop in it and serve it to your old employer?

Despite the failings that I felt exist because of how it downplayed the reality of the situation, I still found myself captivated by the silly narrative. I laughed at many jokes and liked the ending. I felt the end was actually focused on a maid character, not the journalist, like many have said. It's a great film that you can watch as long as you turn off the analytical part of your brain.

Bloody Reunion

Year: 2006
Director: Dae-wung Lim
Writer: Se-yeol Park
Genre: Horror: Thriller, slasher

Also known as To Sir With Love, Bloody Reunion is a pretty sweet movie. That is, sweet as in good not as in sweet as sugar and candy and things. In fact, it's probably as far from anything nice as can be, and that's just the reason I like it.

In Bloody Reunion we are being told a story from an older, sick woman in her hospital bed. She recounts the tale of when all her old students came to visit her in her home. She had been an elementary school teacher back when she was healthy and just wanted to see how everyone turned out after all those years. Each of the small class of students appears at the reunion to recount older times.

Unfortunately, the old times aren't so shining like the teacher might have remembered them. From there, the story slowly breaks down all pretense and gets down to business. Obviously I won't delve further into that but I did quite enjoy the movie. It also felt a bit awkward and worrying to watch like how I felt when seeing Meet the Parents for the first time. I'd say it's definitely worth watching this movie if you've got the stomach for some really unfortunate scenes.

As I'm writing this review over a week after watching I've honestly kind of become blurry as to what the reveal in the ending was. However, I would still like to mention it as it struck me when I was watching. This paragraph is definitely a spoiler so just skip over it if you're not interested. Apparently, the shy "turtle" boy was not ever a boy at all but the daughter of someone (adopted by the teacher?). I'm left really unsure when or why they then started presenting themselves as male. Or did they never and that is just the level of insanity of the teacher who perceives her own child as just a shy boy? From what I gathered, it seems they were always a shy girl, but decided to present as male after horrible events in her life. It was a new self to protect her from those old memories or something but she still had her female identity - presented as the teacher's nurse - to finally seek revenge. Anyway, whatever the root if they were presenting as an alternate gender it makes me a bit annoyed to think that's the way the writer went with it. I'm tired of movies where a mentally unstable character is also trans, both genders, or gender-nonconforming. Yeah, I'm looking at you Sleepaway Camp and Beyond the Valley of the Dolls. And others.

Santa's Slay

Year: 2005
Director: David Steiman
Writer: David Steiman
Genre: Horror: Holiday, slasher

When I first decided to watch this one I was unaware it was so recent. To me it seems like most of the original holiday slasher films were left to the 80s and 90s, not so much now. Apparently I was wrong though and I'm glad I did decide to give it a watch. Unfortunately, it has since gone off Netflix streaming but it's probably available in those cheap horror compilation DVDs found in stores everywhere.

The first thing I honestly noticed about this movie is that it has a brief Fran Drescher cameo in the beginning. I was worried that this was going to be an otherwise subpar film which spent the majority of its budget to get her to appear. Thankfully that didn't turn out to be quite the case although I'm still confused as to why or how they had her in there at all.

Anyway, the film is based around the idea that Santa is actually a terrible demon. He has only been spreading joy and presents for the past 2,000 years because he lost a bet to an angel. The 2,000 year bet is up this Christmas though so Santa finally reverts back to his murderous ways in a small town named Hell. Fitting.

While it's not the smartest movie out there I found it pretty fun to watch. That's often how I feel about holiday-themed horror but maybe that's due to having such low expectations every time. Either way, it's really great to see Santa as some huge, biker-looking guy. There's some really dumb and random humor at parts of the film but I'll let that slide too as who can really take a movie about a murderous Santa Claus seriously?

Hatchet

Year: 2006
Director: Adam Green
Writer: Adam Green
Genre: Horror: Slasher

There are a lot of modern horror movies which try so hard to cash in on the timeless popularity of slashers. Many follow the old tropes and load up a bunch of drunken and lusty teens together to all get slaughtered. There's nothing necessarily wrong with that but it's a bit dull. Hatchet keeps things fresh by giving an interesting sort of premise for the death as well as a decent cast of characters. You don't really hate any of them, whereas in certain horror flicks, you're apt to hate absolutely everyone.

Hatchet is extremely enjoyable. The film starts off with some Mardi Gras celebrations going on. Our main character, however, is completely unamused by the goings on and leaves the festivities. Annoyed, his best friend follows and they both end up taking a boat tour since that sounds much better. The boat is loaded up with quite the cast of characters from a lovely older couple to a pornographer and his two actresses. As one might expect, the boat tour is a horrible idea when they cross into the territory of a murderous man.

From then on the film manages to showcase a lot of gory effects and keep you laughing all the way. It's not completely stupid like some teen or youth focused films which really helps to keep you interested too. I was really pleased with the wit demonstrated in the script as well as some creative kills.

Apparently I wasn't the only one who enjoyed it as Hatchet II came out in 2010. I've yet to see it but it's high up on my list after the fun that was Hatchet. 

Terror Firmer

Year: 1999
Director: Lloyd Kaufman
Writer: Patrick Cassidy, Douglas Buck
Genre: Horror: Comedy

Here's yet another one of those movies I've been meaning to watch. Terror Firmer basically shows the world what it's like filming a Troma movie. As one might expect, it's extremely irreverent and comical.

I'm pleased that no matter the decade that Troma always seems able to pump out films of similar low quality. It does seem that this may be a bit on the higher end of low quality though, which is a bit odd. So the film is basically about the cast of a film crew working on a Toxie project. As it proceeds, people begin to die. What a shocking plot, right?

Anyway, most of the movie's fun comes from the cast who are all equally unusual. From the character who slowly transforms from man to woman throughout the feature to the handsome pickle canner, there's enough strangeness to go around. Although it's filled with pretty lowball humor I still had a ball with it. There are times when these kind of movies really hit the spot.

It's hard to think of what to say about this movie aside from the fact that I really enjoyed it. The effects are pretty good and the laughs are creative as well. Overall I'd love to recommend this movie to everyone but certainly some just won't like the humor. If you have liked other Troma comedy films though maybe this will be right for you.

Home Room

Year: 2002
Director: Paul F. Ryan
Writer: Paul F. Ryan
Genre: Drama

It is probably strange to say but I have quite an interest in school shootings. It is not some sort of crazy death-chasing thing but I am very curious about what kids may have to go through to end up taking such extreme actions. Or, I'm curious about what minds might be fundamentally damaged to lead to events like that. Then I am curious about how teenagers cope after having to live through it. As such, I've devoted a lot of time to watching movies on the subject matter over the years.

Home Room is a pretty good movie mostly because it takes a different angle on school shooting. A lot of films have bravely (or stupidly) attempted to share the stories of the ones who commit the crime. That's fine to do of course but in this film we are instead treated to how characters are dealing with it after the fact. It may be more powerful this way.

One preppy popular teen was grazed by a bullet and is now recovering in the hospital. Another girl, one who has been held back and is anything but preppy, is forced into spending time with her. If not, the principal would just hold her back another year. The two are extreme opposites but slowly bond - but they can't talk about "it". The two seem like nicely realistic characters and because of that I found myself bonding to both of them with ease.

I would have honestly liked there to be a bit more to the film. The characters had such a nice back and forth that there could have easily been a bit more scenes. As is though the film feels mostly perfect in execution. I think at a part near the end of the film it gets a little ham-fisted, but beyond that this is a film worth checking out if you're at all curious about the subject matter.

Enter the Void

Year: 2009
Director: Gaspar Noe
Writer: Gaspar Noe, Lucile Hadzihalilovic
Genre: Drama

I'm not really sure what I can say about Enter the Void. I wholly enjoyed my experience with it but I'm pretty sure everyone's mileage will vary. This was honestly my first film from this director (which is probably blasphemous to even say) but whatever. I've wanted to go and watch I Stand Alone and Irreversible for a while but it seems you need to be in a specific mood to enjoy them. As is, I don't think I've been in the right kind of mood yet for many months.

Anyway, onto Enter the Void. It starts us off in the world of a young man who's doing some drugs. Apparently he's a small-time dealer in Tokyo. Everything seems to be fine but when he goes to drop something off it turns out to be a sting operation. He's chased into the bathroom, shot, and killed. From there the movie really begins and we see his life leading up to this moment and what transpires because of it.

I thought it was a really cool film overall. I'm always a fan for neat cinematic effects and obviously a film about life, death, and drugs would have some cool visuals. It was very nice although I was worried I might have my first seizure during an almost two minute long sequence of a flashing white light. Either way, it was a pretty cool adventure, although not something I would probably watch when just feeling bored.

For one, it's over two hours long which may be too much of a time investment. It's also not an easy movie, necessarily. It feels harsh at times and you have to be at least a little dedicated to the world to enjoy it. Honestly, I don't know what to say other than it was pretty neat but not for everyone. Like, for me I was not a fan of the whole ending sequence for 2001: A Space Odyssey the first time but only because I was watching it for an assignment. Had I been given free run to discover the film on my own and watch on a quiet evening it would have been much more enjoyable.

Thomas in Love

Year: 2000
Director: Pierre-Paul Renders
Writer: Philippe Blasband
Genre: Romance, Sci-Fi

I didn't know what to expect when plunging in with Thomas in Love. The cover looked kind of odd and I worried it was going to be some cheesy Y2K-type romance movie. However, as soon as it started up I was immediately left speechless by what was happening on screen. Every once in a while movies can throw me for a loop within the first five minutes (the closest thing coming to mind right now being Barbarella). Anyway, the movie was pretty weird but I enjoyed it.

Basically the film focuses around a man who is an agoraphobic. This means he can't leave his apartment and also doesn't want anyone ever entering it. Since this is a vision of the future he is able to communicate with services, insurance, and his therapist over videophone. His therapist decides to thrust the man into a dating club and from there the lead character Thomas is introduced to some women.

Although the movie is focused around a then pretty modern concept of video chat it never attempts to play it up. Where some movies would scream about how COOL and FUTURISTIC everything was, this movie plays it straight. If you were living in a world with these devices they would be entirely commonplace and that's how everyone treats them. Of course, now Skype and other programs make Thomas' reality all the more relateable.

I wish there was more to the film because I really did like seeing the world through Thomas' eyes. Basically every second of the film is from his perspective. As such, we're treated to many videophone conversations and left to imagine basically everything else about the apartment and even Thomas himself. This movie probably won't appeal to a lot of people but it'll be a perfect match if you're anything like me.

Hello Mary Lou: Prom Night II

Year: 1987
Director: Bruce Pittman
Writer: Ron Oliver
Genre: Horror: Possession

Prom Night is one of my favorite alternate-to-Carrie high school horror flicks. I really love Jamie Lee Curtis in that movie and overall it was a little too 70s/80s but that made it better. Because of my attachments to the original I was curious how I would or would not like Prom Night II. As it turns out, it's still a pretty fun movie although it's not really attached to the first.

In this film there is basically an alternate past made up where a young slutty high school girl gets burned to death by her scorned lover during the prom queen crowning. From then on her spirit has been contained in a costume trunk (horror movie logic!). Of course, some drab girl unwittingly opens it and gets herself possessed by this powerful personality. It's a neat little story and definitely fun to watch the character that was set up as meek become so completely wild.

I liked it a lot more than I expected myself to. Much like the remade Prom Night I can't place my finger on why these movies even share the same title. They are mostly singular entities not connected by any story. It must be due to the ability to market things best when they are from established franchises. Either way, don't look at this as a sequel but just as a cool teen horror flick.

Incredibly, the Prom Night series spawned two more features after this. I've not seen them yet but am hoping to pick up the double feature DVD soon. Although somehow it is easy to assume they won't be anywhere near the quality of this one...

Poltergeist III

Year: 1988
Director: Gary Sherman
Writer: Gary Sherman, Brian Taggert
Genre: Horror: Haunting

Poltergeist III takes the road less traveled in sequel land. Instead of attempting to further string the same old story out it basically is a brand new film. In fact, the entire family of the original (minus Heather O'Rourke) is absent. She is living with her aunt and uncle for some undisclosed reason in a giant business building. As one might expect, the building becomes haunted due to the young girl having some sort of spiritual connection to the other side.

The film is interesting for the huge leaps of faith it took to create. Who would think it could be creepy to have a giant corporation skyscraper being scary? How does that work? The film handles it very well. Although it sounds hilarious on paper I became very drawn into the story. However, it still falls into a bit of Hollywood excess with some effects. The film could have done without these egregious attempts at "creativity" but whatever.

The creepy guy from the last film returns as he is harassing our heroine. Although, it's a new guy since the previous actor died. The whole Poltergeist curse thing seems mostly silly, but it is creepy to think about the fates of some of the actors in these films. This was Heather's last venture into the Poltergeist world as she died the year it premiered. In fact, I think you can tell that she is not entirely well throughout the film, which makes it a lot more of a depressing watch (if you think about it, anyway).

But then you realize what a strong actress she was. For such a young person she was able to pull out intense scenes and emotions that many adult stars cannot work out at all. Overall, the film is pretty good as long as you don't try judging it against Poltergeist. But since there are almost no connection points between them there's no need to compare anyway.

The Craft

Year: 1996
Director: Andrew Fleming
Writer: Peter Filardi
Genre: Horror: Witchcraft, Teen

I've been ignoring The Craft for a while now. With a tagline like "It's Clueless meets Carrie!" I wasn't quite sure I wanted to touch it. Overall though the movie wasn't bad at all so I'm happy to have watched it. Basically everything starts off when a new girl enters the school. In this high school is a group of three friends who are the "weird" kids. I'm sure there are other weird kids but the point of the movie is this particular set, so there you go.

Anyway, nearly immediately new girl is told by a handsome young guy to stay away from them. Then, for whatever reason she ends up befriending them anyway after the said handsome guy proves himself to be a jerk. The girls aren't weird, per se, but they certainly have interests outside the realm of normal teenagers. They're involved in witchcraft and want the new girl to be their "fourth" as they call it.

With the fourth girl exhibiting natural magical powers she and the others have a lot of fun. Being teenagers though they do a lot without thinking of the repercussions of their actions. Then the film gets a little preachy about it, but not too much. The theme of magic is more realistic than fantasy (although there are certainly some fantastical elements in it).

It's a fine little adventure of a film but I wouldn't particularly recommend it. Still, if you are a fan of Clueless or Carrie maybe it is right down your alley. If nothing else, it's more of a respectable film than the typical teen drivel.

Cecil B. Demented

Year: 2000
Director: John Waters
Writer: John Waters
Genre: Comedy, Crime

It feels like John Waters has lost his edge. Or maybe it's that media has become so edgy that there's really nothing he can show that would drive moviegoers mad anymore. I'm not sure, but his older features definitely exuded an insanity that is not reclaimed by this picture at all. It tries, but is a more manufactured insanity, if there were such a thing.

Cecil B. Demented is still an awesome movie though. We first are shown this famous star Honey Whitlock who is at her latest film premier. While she wouldn't think a second of it, it seems that her career is on a downward slope. Anyways, during the premier a bunch of "cinema terrorist" come and take her away to their movie studio lair. Why? They want her to star in their movie of course.

The characters are all quite aptly "characters". Each has their trademark weirdness and they all seem crazed. Perhaps it's all that cinematic passion burning within them. That, or drugs. So as the renegade filmmakers that they are they only take one shot of each scene. They also tend to jump out of their van and videotape wherever they so please. Random bystanders get caught in the middle and are often punched, pushed, or used in some other fashion for the take.

What I enjoyed about the movie was how fun it is. The characters were all entertaining and went to such wild lengths for their vision that I was happy to be along for the wide. Honey's progression from haughty Hollywood to cinema underground is great as well. Overall, I recommend this movie but it may be a little too silly for some people.

Misery

Year: 1990
Director: Rob Reiner
Writer: Stephen King, William Goldman
Genre: Thriller

First things first I went into this movie without ever reading the original Stephen King work. I'd like to at some point, but basically I've seen every King item before ever attempting to read it. Anyway, so here's Misery which I believe was a hit when it came out.

The story is based around a successful author who has been writing a series of novels. He'd like to finally break away from the series though so in his latest book he kills off the main character (it is not yet published he has just written the draft). As he drives on a snowy road back from his writing retreat, he loses control and crashes off the road. Someone finds him and nurses him back to her house to continue to care for him. This woman happens to only be his biggest fan. But unlike when most people say it, she is truly devoted to the series and its characters.

If you know nothing about Misery then it's probably best you continue to know nothing about it because then the movie can lull you in. You feel like there is something very sweet going on between the author and his caretaker. She is a little awkward, but there's nothing wrong with that. All she wants to do is care for her idol and she's doing an amazing job at it.

Obviously, things can't stay all rosy for this story sprang from the mind of King. The spiraling down to worse and worse moods and conditions is pitch perfect. I wouldn't have sped up or slowed down the progression of anything. It seems perfect. The movie was quite enjoyable and I'm glad to see it was able to become a movie so readily. It seems normally a story focused on two characters alone in a house would be hard to keep interesting.

Being John Malkovich

Year: 1999
Director: Spike Jonze
Writer: Charlie Kaufman
Genre: Comedy, Drama

For anyone who hasn't seen this movie yet, I suggest you do soon. In this post I desire to talk about elements of the movie which are spoilers so I certainly don't want to ruin any of that for you. Suffice it to say, the movie is a very odd romantic triangle, or maybe even a quadrangle, but probably just a triangle. While there are tons of movies like that out there not many of them approach the whole deal the way Being John Malkovich does.

The film starts us off with a very unusual couple. The woman is a caretaker of animals and the other is a puppeteer, at least he wishes to be. As there is no real interest in puppets in this day and age, he finally forces himself to get a not "dream" job, which is office work. However, at his office he discovers a small door behind a filing cabinet, goes inside, and is transported into the mind of a man - John Malkovich. Okay, from here on out is spoiler territory.

I really was confused by the idea of a portal to someone's mind just being in an office, but it's the reality of the movie. In a way, it reminds me a lot of magical realism, where everything is just up front no matter how crazy it may otherwise seem. It became very strange and almost disturbing when they abused their ability to have Malkovich as purely a vessel. I quickly got over that though as the actual Malkovich character drifted into the background as he was overrun by the main character and his wife.

I was mostly interested in the relationship between the leading man Craig, his wife Lotte, and the business partner Maxine. Through the proxy of Malkovich's body, Maxine falls for both Lotte and Craig. What most intrigued me was the point when Lotte realized why being in Malkovich pleased her so - that she felt the strong desire to be male. Whether this was a valid thought or mostly just one of her little flings is unknown, but it certainly seems true she loved Maxine. And of course, Maxine loved her... but through Malkovich. I don't know. I just really loved the weird genderplay and relationships going on. That, both the husband and wife would lust after the same woman certainly isn't the usual story in movies so I appreciated it.

Interestingly, none of these characters are really appealing. They all have their problems and all do terrible things at points in the film. Of course, in all actuality, Maxine is probably the worst by never really being a reliable person but both Craig and Lotte adore her all the same. Anyway, the characters are all generally screwed up but it was still an enjoyable movie. It's hard for me to say I usually like movies where every character is one you'd like to yell at to stop doing what they're doing.

So there's some brief thoughts on the film. I really love the weird love triangle and unusual story. I'll probably watch it again soon.

The Video Dead

Year: 1987
Director: Robert Scott
Writer: Robert Scott
Genre: Horror: Zombies

The Video Dead is one of those movies that I've been intending to see for a good few years. It's been on Netflix streaming for a while, I think. Because of my impending termination of Netflix subscription I've been trying to clear up my streaming queue before it's gone. Anyways, let's talk about the movie.

The story starts off with a man, living alone, who one day receives a package he didn't send for in the mail. It is a TV set. Disgruntled and confused about who could have sent him a TV, he plugs it in all the same and watches it. The only channel that works is one showing a zombie film. While he drifts off late at night with the TV still on zombies from the film make their way out of the set and into his home. The poor man dies (this all happens in the first 5 or so minutes of the film) and then the house is emptied, ready to be sold to a family.

So basically we know what the TV is capable when a teen boy and girl hop into the house before their parents get there. What happens from there is a very strange story in which no character is safe from the grasp of the video dead.

I thought this movie was better than it was expected to be. The premise is silly and in fact comes a year after TerrorVision which also had monsters escaping from televisions. It seems that theme wouldn't be revisited again until Ringu/The Ring years later. The movie also comes up with some really unusual situations regarding the zombies. Sometimes they are shambling and seem stupid but they really appear to be sentient. There are also only about 6 or so zombies so you get to see the "character" of them.

If you're hankering for a zombie film that's stuck in the 80s then this is a good choice. It kind of reminds me of Night of the Creeps too somehow, but this one isn't played quite as a comedy/parody.

Matinee

Year: 1993
Director: Joe Dante
Movie: Charles S. Haas
Genre: Comedy

Set near the end o the Cold War era, this is a strange little movie. Jon Goodman plays a Hollywood wannabe hotshot who is making sci-fi pictures. I say "wannabe" because although he thinks he's better than Hitchcock he really only succeeds at making 50s era-style silly sci-fi movies. His latest creation, "Mant", is about to play in a small town.A young teen boy widly devours everything sci-fi, so he is excited as can be that the famous director of these movies is coming to his city. From there, things get goofy.

Matinee is a sort of treasure. I'd generally have never picked it up but it's kind of a cute love letter of sorts to the eras gone by. I'd love to sit in a theater with a movie in Smell-O-Vision, Shock-O-Vision, Scare-O-Rama, or anything like that. But obviously those things were never meant to catch on which is why we're mostly done with that dumb stuff today (well, maybe 3D can be classified the same way much of the time).

The movie is strange because there are multiple layers of reality going on simultaneously. It's nothing deep like Inception, just that there is the reality of the movie plot, the character's in the  movie theater plot, and the overarching Cold War scare. It's silly and cute.

Strangely though the whole movie seems to be parodying the fact that people were scared at all for these events. Sure, ducking and covering wouldn't have done any good but still, there was certainly a legitimate reason for people to be scared out of their minds at times. Well, I suppose it was a nice message for the time anyway. Overall the movie is nice PG fare with a fun sci-fi twist. Besides, Mant is a hilarious movie and worth watching all by itself.

Clownhouse

Year: 1989
Director: Victor Salva
Writer: Victor Salva
Genre: Horror: Clowns

I came into Clownhouse expecting a pretty terrible movie. I mean, what is that name supposed to imply? The house of clowns? A house made of clowns? It just doesn't sound very scary. The movie doesn't end up ever being too frightful anyway, but that doesn't make it a fine film.

Clownhouse would never win any awards for doing something entirely new. It's basically a very simple story. There are three brothers and the youngest one is afraid of clowns. The older two goad him about this a lot and have decided to take him to the circus anyway. At the same time, a group of mental hospital patients have escaped nearby. They end up killing and dressing up as clowns and cause a lot of trouble for the three boys.

The first thing that caught my attention was the teasing, ridicule, and generally perfect capturing of brotherly behaviors. It also struck me that there were three. In many movies there is a focus on two siblings, or just one child and parents. It was a nice view on the story and it worked well.

There's not very much gore and there's basically no sexuality either. I'm very appreciative of horror movies that don't rely on either to draw in an audience. Clownhouse isn't for kids either though. Well, it could be but it would probably terrify the child for a few good nights.

The Rage: Carrie 2

Year: 1999
Director: Katt Shea
Writer: Rafael Moreu
Genre: Horror: Thriller

If someone ever approached me to make a sequel for a Stephen King book-based movie I'd probably die. Of course, nobody would ever propose such a thing from me but I'm just saying. I can only assume that Katt Shea was impossibly pleased when offered this chance. Probably pretty terrified too.

The movie is interesting because in a way it is a remake. Or, not so much a remake but a re-imagining. Remake or re-imagining though, that would not count as a true "sequel". However, the movie has the title Carrie 2 because it is a sequel. It takes place 20 or so years after Carrie and with a new lead. However, she goes through a lot of the same style of experiences as in the first film.

However, the circumstances are definitely different. The lead is not a terribly meekish and unloved high school student. She may still be somewhat of an outcast, but not nearly to the degree as Carrie was. It's nice to see that this girl can stand on her two feet slinging insults with the rest of the teenage crowd. Because she is not Carrie it helps set a different tone for the movie as well as keep things interesting. You basically know that something has to happen to set off the climactic sequence, but getting there is a lot of fun. Unfortunately I don't think any climax could top the famous pig blood scene of Carrie, but that's okay. I won't hold it against Carrie 2.

Some people may not like this movie because the character is not a Carrie clone. However, I like it exactly for that reason. So, if you're in the mood for a better than average sequel this is a fine choice.

Critters

Year: 1986
Director: Stephen Herek
Writer: Stephen Herek, Domonic Muir
Genre: Horror: Comedy, monster

Critters is a distinctly 80s movie. That's probably the first thing I noticed. I got that feeling as soon as I saw the father walking around in a shirt parodying Ghostbusters and a moment where a "critter" went face to face with an E.T. doll. There's nothing wrong with the 80s of course and in this case it didn't really hurt the movie.

The movie itself is a pretty enjoyable ride. If you've seen and enjoyed Attack of the Killer Tomatoes this is probably right up your alley. In that one, the implausible killer tomatoes made everything absolutely hilarious. Here, the "critters" appear as weird little furry balls. They roll around like fuzzy tumbleweeds and devour everything they can. It seems funny to be scared of furry balls with mouths but that's part of the reason the whole thing is so enjoyable.

Each and every character realizes these monsters are ridiculous, but they respond in terror all the same. Wouldn't you, if you were faced with a furball launching itself at your brother or sister and taking a chunk out of them? The aliens themselves talk to each other occasionally and it's always for an extra laugh. I can expect that in the sequels the critters become more of a character instead of focusing on those being attacked by them.

I liked the movie. It's not very important in the canon of cinema but you could find worse things to do with an hour and a half.

Christmas Evil

Year: 1980
Director: Lewis Jackson
Writer: Lewis Jackson
Genre: Horror: Holiday

Also known as You Better Watch Out, Christmas Evil is an example of one of the best Christmas horror films.  Of course, the pedigree of most holiday-themed slashers isn't very high, but Christmas Evil is pretty exceptional.

The movie starts us off with a lovely family Christmas Eve. One young boy thinks he hears Santa so he descends down the stairs to check. Unfortunately, he comes across a mentally-scarring scene instead which haunts him for the rest of his life (well, into his 40s or so which is when the film takes place). Despite this scene etched into the back of his mind, he has come to love Christmas and even works for a toy company.

Our lead is so ultimately pitiful that's it kind of hard to feel for him. Still, it's fun to watch his antics and try to get an idea of what he's thinking. For a Christmas horror film it's not nearly as slasher-tastic as others tend to go (I'm looking at you Silent Night, Deadly Night). It's dark, sure, but in a more believable way than most. When watching it I was struck at the fact there was even a cohesive plot in it and not just an excuse to have a guy in a Santa suit slash up pedestrians.

It's rare to find a holiday horror film that's actually decent. I'm happy to have watched it and suggest maybe viewing Trick 'r Treat alongside it. I'd have said Black Christmas (1974) instead but that's not nearly as Christmas-related as this, nor as "friendly" a horror film.